[brydo]

It’s been a catastrophic 18 months and if your reading this then, fingers crossed, you’ve survived the worse. Pandemic aside most people on this forum will be suffering from other ailments and, without giving personal details, I think its good to talk about health issues.

I am fortunate to be relatively healthy, bar I minor heart problem, but mentally this past year or so have been a bit of a struggle but thankfully I’m coming through it.

So how the hell are you?

Topic

[ajn]

This tread could be great, give people chance to vent or explain/express themselves when needed..

Must say so grateful for the gardens throughout the shielding process, it really helped me for sure..

 

 

[brydo]

Just back in from watering the plants, too hot for me ajn.

How you keeping?

[ajn]

Glad to be getting out a bit more Brydo that’s a fact tbh…

hope this thread will give people time and chance to chat without judgement..

[Brydo]

?

[Phaedra]

Recovering from a nasty car accident a year ago (on my birthday!), driver coming the other way in an over sized Transit type van doing 40mph thought it was on fire (it wasn’t) and jumped out leaving it to career over to my side of the carriageway and write off my Yeti.  Had to be cut out but luckily still in one piece (sort of!).

Just had another othapaedic specialist examine me and still have big problems with my right shoulder so have to have an MRI for that and 8-10 physio sessions to see if it will improve (unlikely).  Suffering some sort of neurological impairment which has affected my co-ordination on the right side so typing is full of spelling mistahes and I keep banging my right hand on things like the washing machine door opening or walking into dooways and hitting my right side.

I also need to see a cardiologist as the ambulance found I had atrial fibrillation (didn’t have it before the accident) and it’s not settled down as well as they hoped.

They also found 2 masses on my kidneys, had a CT scan last August and just had another 3 phase scan which was supposed to be urgent and done by last December but was cancelled 3 times.

Apart from that I’m still here so that’s a bonus 🙂

Please excuse spelling/typos. Apart from being a clot it turns out I had one on my cerebellum that's now causing various problems!

[ajn]

? wow Phaedra, what a time you’ve had of it..

[Georgie]

Wow, Phaedra.  Commiserations.  Puts my bad back into perspective.

very gentle {{{Phaedra}}}

[Tharg]

By all the Gods, Phaedra! That’s a totally rough deal. Sympathies from me and Mrs T. How DO you keep so cheerful (and helpful!).  Was going to post some stuff about my conditions but, well, I’ve nothing to complain about…

[Phaedra]

Thanks for the good wishes 🙂

Funny thing but up until my birthday last year all I had to worry about was the mobility/pain problems and a damaged left shoulder from a previous accident about 2006!.

I really was very lucky, fire brigade reckoned that the engine bulkhead took most of the impact, just 12″ further back and the van would have came straight through my door and squished me.  So until I get the latest CT scan results I just work on the assumption that I’m still alive so things can’t be that bad 🙂

Please excuse spelling/typos. Apart from being a clot it turns out I had one on my cerebellum that's now causing various problems!

[Tharg]

Dear Phaedra… Lost in admiration for your glass-more-than-half-full approach to stuff. Take care!

[Georgie]

“I just work on the assumption that I’m still alive so things can’t be that bad ?”

I’m never been a natural ‘glass half full’ person, unfortunately.  More – ‘Glass?  What glass?’

But since the cancer thing back in 2014 I’ve tried to be a bit more positive.  I have to remind myself that “It beats the alternative!”  😀

[Phaedra]

Yes indeed 🙂

I do still enjoy my life but in the great scheme of things I’m now 65, there’s nothing I need or want so I can go whenever it happens. My only worry is my 31yr old Autistic son who lives with me.

I’ve been his sole carer since his mum left 15 years ago, she has almost nothing whatsoever to do with him apart from the odd birthday or Xmas card (usually late!).  We live in a quiet over 55’s bungalow which is ideal for him.  However, when I pass my HA won’t let him stay here (they are adamant on that) so unless I live for another 24 years he’s going to be in big trouble 🙁  The lady next door was moved when her dad passed, they put her in a flat next to druggies and the scum of the earth, she lasted 18 months 🙁

I have him on all the local housing lists etc. but getting somewhere in a decent area with some support for him is proving impossible.  He won’t go live with his mum, that’s never going to happen.  His older brother has been living in Amsterdam for several years and has no plans to return to the UK.  His younger sister lives with his mum and has her own problems as a result.  I really can’t rely on his mum or sister to look after him.

 

Please excuse spelling/typos. Apart from being a clot it turns out I had one on my cerebellum that's now causing various problems!

[Phaedra]

And 45mins after posting the above I got an email from one of the housing sites!

I bid on a 1 bed flat in central Durham, he was in 2nd place so didn’t get it.  They asked me to call the office about it, I range and was on hold for 40mins but when I got through they couldn’t get hold of the person I needed to speak to.

She’s going to ring me tomorrow so it looks like he may be in with a chance.  He’s not happy about the idea but at least this way he has a secure tenancy in a decent area, I’ll be here to help him get settled and organised and if it doesn’t work out he can always come back here.

Please excuse spelling/typos. Apart from being a clot it turns out I had one on my cerebellum that's now causing various problems!

[Georgie]

Oh I do hope it’s good news.  The outlook for disabled people on their own is pretty grim if they don’t have anyone to fight for them and can’t afford to pay for Private Care.

My friend’s youngest (mid-twenties now) is ‘high-functioning’ autistic and she had to fight tooth and nail to get him into decent S.A. where he’s supported enough to continue working as a chef, which helps pay for that support.   My older brother’s in Sheltered Accommodation after years of trying.  He was only in his 40’s when he moved into a 1 bedroom bungalow where everyone else in the S.A. cul-de-sac was in their 70’s+, and he gets no actual ‘help’ from anyone but family.

[Phaedra]

Unfortunately that all sounds very familiar! 🙁

Got a call from the housing woman, no idea who I am, not on the application or Jared’s file, no record of him being Autistic either!!.

She’s passed it over to someone else who’ll ring me later in the week to arrange another call to go over his application and needs which should take about 25-35mins!!. All being well the flat (if we get it) should be ready to let “several weeks” after that ??

Please excuse spelling/typos. Apart from being a clot it turns out I had one on my cerebellum that's now causing various problems!

[Tharg]

Phaedra, I do hope you get somewhere with the “new” contact. Dealing with local authorities is nearly as bad as trying to get sense out of the NHS. Good luck. Take care.

[Georgie]

Awesome service, isn’t it.

Got a ‘phone call from my friend with the autistic son this morning.  We haven’t spoken for a couple of months so had some catching up to do.  Turns out that the restaurant where her son worked had to close due to loss of skilled staff from Europe (Pubs and restaurants not opening at lunchtime due to staff shortages os currently a huge problem, apparently).  So he lost his income, which meant he couldn’t pay his 50% for his Care, so he lost his place in the Sheltered Accommodation (where he was settled for more than 5 years and had a great support network) and is now living back home with her and working part-time as a shelf-filler in Waitrose.

She and her husband are/were moving to Norfolk in a few weeks and now they either have to find him a new job that pays enough that he can live independently again in London, or put the house they just bought back on the market and stay put, or move and take him with them to a place where he know nobody, in a region offering far fewer suitable employment options for him within the radius of a short bus ride (assuming there’s a Bus Service) because he can’t drive.

Ho.  Hum.

[Phaedra]

Well no surprises here, no phone call from the housing association 🙁

I did get a call from the nice young lady at Home Group who helped with our initial application to Durham Key Options (where the local HA’s list their properties for rent). She wasn’t happy they hadn’t rang and made me promise to keep her in the loop during next week if anything (or nothing) happens.

Please excuse spelling/typos. Apart from being a clot it turns out I had one on my cerebellum that's now causing various problems!

[Georgie]

“to arrange another call to go over his application and needs which should take about 25-35mins!!”

And then they didn’t call you back, even though they said they would?  Well knock me down with the proverbial feather.  To be honest, I’m surprised they want to ‘go over his needs’ via a ‘phone call, rather than send out a 30 page form asking for details in the minutiae so that they can

a) Ignore it

b) Lose it

c) Claim they never even received it

d) Rewrite it to say that he doesn’t actually qualify for help

 

[ajn]

Warning RANT

 

?I feel like knackered, pi$$€d off with pain, ? ffs I’ve had enough of the ?..

Rant over, sorry for any upset ?

[Tharg]

@ajn Please don’t worry about ranting once in a while. Given who we are in this forum and why we are here, it helps to open the pressure-relief valve once in a while! ?

[ajn]

Thanks @Tharg guess we all get a bit moody or down with it all (medication don’t help,especially when it do t help)..

Feeling relaxed now pain there but better mood ?, The night can go on forever sometimes, yet sometimes I like it..

Best of luck to others here with the above probs at the moment too..?

?

[Georgie]

Sorry you’re having a rotten time of it, ajn.  Rant away, old chap.  We’ve all been there and the lack of sleep doesn’t help either.

{{{ajn}}}

I hope the pills can keep things at least moderately tolerable for you.

[ajn]

<p style=”text-align: left;”>Yes we’ve all been there @Georgie, surprisingly I’ve had a relaxing easy morning sorting out the fishing lures, weights, hooks and stuff..</p>
So all good now, the mood that is ?

[Brydo]

Hope you have a better night tonight ajn my wife suffers a lot of pain and it is a toss up between being in pain or doped and groggy which =,S no quality of life ?

[Author]

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