How the hell are you?

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  • #156416 Reply
    brydo

    It’s been a catastrophic 18 months and if your reading this then, fingers crossed, you’ve survived the worse. Pandemic aside most people on this forum will be suffering from other ailments and, without giving personal details, I think its good to talk about health issues.

    I am fortunate to be relatively healthy, bar I minor heart problem, but mentally this past year or so have been a bit of a struggle but thankfully I’m coming through it.

    So how the hell are you?

Viewing 25 replies - 1 through 25 (of 55 total)
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  • #156421 Reply
    ajn

    This tread could be great, give people chance to vent or explain/express themselves when needed..

    Must say so grateful for the gardens throughout the shielding process, it really helped me for sure..

     

     

    #156429 Reply
    brydo

    Just back in from watering the plants, too hot for me ajn.

    How you keeping?

    #156436 Reply
    ajn

    Glad to be getting out a bit more Brydo thatโ€™s a fact tbhโ€ฆ

    hope this thread will give people time and chance to chat without judgement..

    #156437 Reply
    Brydo

    ๐Ÿ‘

    #156439 Reply
    Phaedra
    Participant

    Recovering from a nasty car accident a year ago (on my birthday!), driver coming the other way in an over sized Transit type van doing 40mph thought it was on fire (it wasn’t) and jumped out leaving it to career over to my side of the carriageway and write off my Yeti.ย  Had to be cut out but luckily still in one piece (sort of!).

    Just had another othapaedic specialist examine me and still have big problems with my right shoulder so have to have an MRI for that and 8-10 physio sessions to see if it will improve (unlikely).ย  Suffering some sort of neurological impairment which has affected my co-ordination on the right side so typing is full of spelling mistahes and I keep banging my right hand on things like the washing machine door opening or walking into dooways and hitting my right side.

    I also need to see a cardiologist as the ambulance found I had atrial fibrillation (didn’t have it before the accident) and it’s not settled down as well as they hoped.

    They also found 2 masses on my kidneys, had a CT scan last August and just had another 3 phase scan which was supposed to be urgent and done by last December but was cancelled 3 times.

    Apart from that I’m still here so that’s a bonus ๐Ÿ™‚

    There's room for all God's creatures, right next to the mash and gravy ๐Ÿ™‚

    #156465 Reply
    ajn

    ๐Ÿ˜ณ wow Phaedra, what a time youโ€™ve had of it..

    #156500 Reply
    Georgie

    Wow, Phaedra.ย  Commiserations.ย  Puts my bad back into perspective.

    very gentle {{{Phaedra}}}

    #156551 Reply
    Tharg
    Participant

    By all the Gods, Phaedra! That’s a totally rough deal. Sympathies from me and Mrs T. How DO you keep so cheerful (and helpful!).ย  Was going to post some stuff about my conditions but, well, I’ve nothing to complain about…

    #156559 Reply
    Phaedra
    Participant

    Thanks for the good wishes ๐Ÿ™‚

    Funny thing but up until my birthday last year all I had to worry about was the mobility/pain problems and a damaged left shoulder from a previous accident about 2006!.

    I really was very lucky, fire brigade reckoned that the engine bulkhead took most of the impact, just 12″ further back and the van would have came straight through my door and squished me.ย  So until I get the latest CT scan results I just work on the assumption that I’m still alive so things can’t be that bad ๐Ÿ™‚

    There's room for all God's creatures, right next to the mash and gravy ๐Ÿ™‚

    #156581 Reply
    Tharg
    Participant

    Dear Phaedra… Lost in admiration for your glass-more-than-half-full approach to stuff. Take care!

    #156588 Reply
    Georgie

    “I just work on the assumption that Iโ€™m still alive so things canโ€™t be that bad ๐Ÿ™‚”

    I’m never been a natural ‘glass half full’ person, unfortunately.ย  More – ‘Glass?ย  What glass?’

    But since the cancer thing back in 2014 I’ve tried to be a bit more positive.ย  I have to remind myself that “It beats the alternative!”ย  ๐Ÿ˜€

    #156637 Reply
    Phaedra
    Participant

    Yes indeed ๐Ÿ™‚

    I do still enjoy my life but in the great scheme of things I’m now 65, there’s nothing I need or want so I can go whenever it happens. My only worry is my 31yr old Autistic son who lives with me.

    I’ve been his sole carer since his mum left 15 years ago, she has almost nothing whatsoever to do with him apart from the odd birthday or Xmas card (usually late!).ย  We live in a quiet over 55’s bungalow which is ideal for him.ย  However, when I pass my HA won’t let him stay here (they are adamant on that) so unless I live for another 24 years he’s going to be in big trouble ๐Ÿ™ย  The lady next door was moved when her dad passed, they put her in a flat next to druggies and the scum of the earth, she lasted 18 months ๐Ÿ™

    I have him on all the local housing lists etc. but getting somewhere in a decent area with some support for him is proving impossible.ย  He won’t go live with his mum, that’s never going to happen.ย  His older brother has been living in Amsterdam for several years and has no plans to return to the UK.ย  His younger sister lives with his mum and has her own problems as a result.ย  I really can’t rely on his mum or sister to look after him.

     

    There's room for all God's creatures, right next to the mash and gravy ๐Ÿ™‚

    #156643 Reply
    Phaedra
    Participant

    And 45mins after posting the above I got an email from one of the housing sites!

    I bid on a 1 bed flat in central Durham, he was in 2nd place so didn’t get it.ย  They asked me to call the office about it, I range and was on hold for 40mins but when I got through they couldn’t get hold of the person I needed to speak to.

    She’s going to ring me tomorrow so it looks like he may be in with a chance.ย  He’s not happy about the idea but at least this way he has a secure tenancy in a decent area, I’ll be here to help him get settled and organised and if it doesn’t work out he can always come back here.

    There's room for all God's creatures, right next to the mash and gravy ๐Ÿ™‚

    #156664 Reply
    Georgie

    Oh I do hope it’s good news.ย  The outlook for disabled people on their own is pretty grim if they don’t have anyone to fight for them and can’t afford to pay for Private Care.

    My friend’s youngest (mid-twenties now) is ‘high-functioning’ autistic and she had to fight tooth and nail to get him into decent S.A. where he’s supported enough to continue working as a chef, which helps pay for that support.ย  ย My older brother’s in Sheltered Accommodation after years of trying.ย  He was only in his 40’s when he moved into a 1 bedroom bungalow where everyone else in the S.A. cul-de-sac was in their 70’s+, and he gets no actual ‘help’ from anyone but family.

    #156747 Reply
    Phaedra
    Participant

    Unfortunately that all sounds very familiar! ๐Ÿ™

    Got a call from the housing woman, no idea who I am, not on the application or Jared’s file, no record of him being Autistic either!!.

    She’s passed it over to someone else who’ll ring me later in the week to arrange another call to go over his application and needs which should take about 25-35mins!!. All being well the flat (if we get it) should be ready to let “several weeks” after that ๐Ÿ™„๐Ÿ™„

    There's room for all God's creatures, right next to the mash and gravy ๐Ÿ™‚

    #156775 Reply
    Tharg
    Participant

    Phaedra, I do hope you get somewhere with the “new” contact. Dealing with local authorities is nearly as bad as trying to get sense out of the NHS. Good luck. Take care.

    #156990 Reply
    Georgie

    Awesome service, isn’t it.

    Got a ‘phone call from my friend with the autistic son this morning.ย  We haven’t spoken for a couple of months so had some catching up to do.ย  Turns out that the restaurant where her son worked had to close due to loss of skilled staff from Europe (Pubs and restaurants not opening at lunchtime due to staff shortages os currently a huge problem, apparently).ย  So he lost his income, which meant he couldn’t pay his 50% for his Care, so he lost his place in the Sheltered Accommodation (where he was settled for more than 5 years and had a great support network) and is now living back home with her and working part-time as a shelf-filler in Waitrose.

    She and her husband are/were moving to Norfolk in a few weeks and now they either have to find him a new job that pays enough that he can live independently again in London, or put the house they just bought back on the market and stay put, or move and take him with them to a place where he know nobody, in a region offering far fewer suitable employment options for him within the radius of a short bus ride (assuming there’s a Bus Service) because he can’t drive.

    Ho.ย  Hum.

    #157145 Reply
    Phaedra
    Participant

    Well no surprises here, no phone call from the housing association ๐Ÿ™

    I did get a call from the nice young lady at Home Group who helped with our initial application to Durham Key Options (where the local HA’s list their properties for rent). She wasn’t happy they hadn’t rang and made me promise to keep her in the loop during next week if anything (or nothing) happens.

    There's room for all God's creatures, right next to the mash and gravy ๐Ÿ™‚

    #157271 Reply
    Georgie

    “to arrange another call to go over his application and needs which should take about 25-35mins!!”

    And then they didn’t call you back, even though they said they would?ย  Well knock me down with the proverbial feather.ย  To be honest, I’m surprised they want to ‘go over his needs’ via a ‘phone call, rather than send out a 30 page form asking for details in the minutiae so that they can

    a) Ignore it

    b) Lose it

    c) Claim they never even received it

    d) Rewrite it to say that he doesn’t actually qualify for help

     

    #157416 Reply
    ajn

    Warning RANT

     

    ๐ŸคฌI feel like knackered, pi$$โ‚ฌd off with pain, ๐Ÿ‘Ž ffs Iโ€™ve had enough of the ๐Ÿ’ฉ..

    Rant over, sorry for any upset ๐Ÿ˜ณ

    #157423 Reply
    Tharg
    Participant

    @ajn Please don’t worry about ranting once in a while. Given who we are in this forum and why we are here, it helps to open the pressure-relief valve once in a while! ๐Ÿ˜ก

    #157430 Reply
    ajn

    Thanks @Tharg guess we all get a bit moody or down with it all (medication donโ€™t help,especially when it do t help)..

    Feeling relaxed now pain there but better mood ๐Ÿ‘, The night can go on forever sometimes, yet sometimes I like it..

    Best of luck to others here with the above probs at the moment too..๐Ÿ‘

    ๐ŸŒป

    #157490 Reply
    Georgie

    Sorry you’re having a rotten time of it, ajn.ย  Rant away, old chap.ย  We’ve all been there and the lack of sleep doesn’t help either.

    {{{ajn}}}

    I hope the pills can keep things at least moderately tolerable for you.

    #157496 Reply
    ajn

    <p style=”text-align: left;”>Yes weโ€™ve all been there @Georgie, surprisingly Iโ€™ve had a relaxing easy morning sorting out the fishing lures,ย weights, hooks and stuff..</p>
    So all good now, the mood that is ๐Ÿ™‚

    #157530 Reply
    Brydo

    Hope you have a better night tonight ajn my wife suffers a lot of pain and it is a toss up between being in pain or doped and groggy which =,S no quality of life ๐Ÿ˜ž

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