Thank you, everyone… (walks on to podium and accepts trophy from Julia Roberts). Especial thanks to my dear wife who has supported me through thick and thin but couldn’t be here tonight when she heard that Ms Roberts was coming. Also to my wonderful dog Tilly who has given silent support on the sofa and very kindly kept her nose off the keyboard. I must leave now as Ms Roberts and I have another engagement… (exits with Roberts towering languidly over him).