The thing is, she’s a really nice woman, just hopeless with dogs. (Turns out there are still 2 – they must just be barking in shifts). She always talks to her dogs in a ‘conversational’ voice so they don’t really understand what they’re supposed to do. Watching them take her for a drag around the golf course every morning is an entertainment in itself. There are plenty of actual dog owners around here who could give her a few hints, but even I know you don’t ask dogs to do things or try to reason with them, you tell them.